They Don’t Understand Women – AYM4

How young men end up being angry young men and probably violent even though they don’t want to be.

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A man by design is an authentic, brave, believing expression of the man version of human.

Alas, what you meet on the street or get into an elevator with is likely an insecure jumble of random goals, half baked intentions and unrealistic self-help affirmations.

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Regardless of his facade many a man is a cocktail of doubt and aggression. In many of us men this seamlessly translates into very little self-confidence to access our natural emotional agility to be able to listen. We can listen. We listen to deliver satisfaction. However if the person speaking seeks fulfillment, instead of getting either satisfaction or fulfillment, we have conflict.

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Men are great at one thing: being men. The art of Being a man is doing that one thing to get many results. Like going to work pays you money but also brings you satisfaction, admiration from your family, peace for spouse/children and life education for challenges ahead.

Society’s life education about men and women is lacking to the point of being harmful. Therefore the level of man in the world today is low when compared to our abilities and innate sentiments.

It is exactly these beautiful emotions a man has for those who surround him that he needs to shine on himself. That way each man can be his own salvation or inspiration or …

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Now because women are naturally different they very often arrive at certain insights via different avenues before a man does. Women might assume that men will, and should, have complimentary insights.

Our history of interpersonal conflict illustrates that men don’t work like that at a societal level. We can create a new narrative for men.

A man connected to his natural spontaneity, vision and get-up-and-go will have put himself in the position to observe the similarities with women in the desire to grow and the differences in their expressions.

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Where’s The Bridge ?

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There is a swampy bit near the end of our walk in the park ravine where our golden retriever just loves to romp around chest deep in the muck. No doubt the muddy water would be cooling on a hot day but this is April. In Ontario. In a few nooks of shade there can be found caches of snow. Vestiges of a long and beautiful winter. So a dog wouldn’t be needing to cool down too much but for her there is so much exploring to do following the scent of the local fox, rabbit or squirrel.

As she emerges happy as can be now mud black on all four legs her next stop is the slow running river we cross to get back to the parking lot. She trots into the water and takes a few gulps as I take off my shoes and socks. She can sense what is coming up. She plays around a bit more and I get her by the collar now myself knee deep in the more than chilly spring water. It is invigorating for about a minute and turns to numbing soon after. So I scoop water onto her with my free hand. She absolutely hates baths but puts up with them in the river or lake. I get her looking clean but the swampy smell will only become apparent when we are back in the confines of the car.

She is panting and happy. Me rolling down the window to get some fresh air while recognizing the elongated buzz in my feet from the shallow yet still intriguing rocky cold river.

The water, the river, the flow – all them participants in the physical cleaning, mood healing and soul rejuvenating that we experience without fail.

Another river that catches my attention and awe is the River of Changes.

The River of Changes constantly runs through our life bringing challenges and opportunities.

From one grassy bank of the river we can observe in confusion with a victim mentality. Meaning we feel we are not the author of our life nor do we have the resources to be so. Sometimes we do nothing and get stuck in the habit of making this our personal outlook.

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Other time’s we are

Moved to grow. That means thinking what we want and what we can do about it. So.

How do you get to the other side: where there should be a different way of looking at the river. A different story for our life. Do we: use,Helicopter, drone, swim, ferry, canoe? All are viable options. However that means all your energy is invested in the focus required to stay afloat in the hopes of getting to the other side where apparently there is another way of looking at things. Looking at the same river, same flow, same current from another engaging perspective. Will you make it to the other side? Will you tip over and put yourself into danger. Do you have any passengers in your canoe? Maybe attempt a crossing and you just turn back as it is difficult to read the currents and avoid the rocks.

Not worth the risk. The uncertainty.

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Or.

Or you can build a bridge. A bridge you build with a pillars made of bricks of communication. Held together with the mortar of the Three Understandings (what, why, how).

A bridge designed to withstand the current of the river of change. What do you call that Bridge? The bridge that takes us easily (once it is built)from victim mindset to proactive?

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From viewing the water of change flowing in one direction to the opposite direction. Without making anyone wrong or bad. What help do we need?

Anti-Aging formula

Be free! Be radical! Just don’t let them run rampant in your body because that is going to make you old, older, oldish. Free radicals cause aging. Smiles and wrinkles are free. Thinking for yourself keeps you right on track with whatever age you are.

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What is the oldest anti-aging product in the history of those sorts of things?

Funny. Use something old so you don’t become old. Is that hypocrisy? Marketing?

Is this one of those ads at the back of a magazine in the classifieds?

The natural way not not to age is to grow.

Obviously:). We are not talking about freezing your body or botoxing or any medical procedure.

We are talking about your mindset. And what life development trajectory that puts you on.

Because we all get old.

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Day by day.

We all get wrinkles, lose hair, slow down, change priorities. That is different from aging.

Aging is when we cannot flow with the progression of life stages. Each life stage offers us the necessary energies and knowings to participate in it. Each stage also requires our participation be regenerative. To be clear being regenerative is taking what you are given and making something positive with it. It might not be fair or fun but it is wise. And wisdom is the residue of operating with an elder mindset. It’s an attitude that can form and construct the foundation for your next stage in life.

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So be nice. And grow. Grow up. Towards the light. Grow more curious and thorough as you grow old. Grow the service aspect of your life. Service to others, the planet, your body, your soul.

Planetary Arts Series – Mars

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My teacher Elliott taught Xing-yi in the park. It was $10 a class or pay what you can. I think at least half the class took the second option. Most of us were 20 something new arrivals in Taos, New Mexico working in cafes or construction waiting for ski season.

This class was my first exposure to martial arts. Elliott was an awesome instructor. I remember he asked if I had any experience – ‘no’. He said that was usually better because I didn’t have any habits to overcome. I went for a few months that autumn and never returned.

However you could say I had been into martial arts most my life.

What is meant by that is illustrated in the following brief writing.

Martial Arts.

Bruce Lee was the man! He was the whole Hollywood package. Taking Kung fu to the people.

Martial Arts, if we break it down, could be said to be the Art of War at an individual level companioning the pursuit of peace at tribal level.

Fighting happens. We need to protect ourselves. Our community and at the same time each one of us. Because of the energies involved in the physical or strategic battles it can be very hard, coarse, adversarial, debilitating, draining. That does not mean it is artless. The very stress of the fight, battle and struggle calls for specific skills. If we can activate our skills of self management in war then we have the way to move beyond it. Fighting is a way to communicate what we value and is not a form of communication in itself. Meaning we are fighting for something. For safety or peace or integrity or dignity.

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Mars was the god of war from Ancient Rome which speaks to the tribal level of martial managment. The Chinese masters have brought forward with dedication through the ages the forms and sequences of self management of the energy of the red planet. Today we are equally tasked to manage what energy we attract, process and how we dispose of it. We dispose of energy in so many simple and natural ways: conversation, sleep, digestión and organ function in the body.

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Said in a conceptual sense, Martial Arts are the system of cleaning, garbage and recycling. So in reality we could say planetary/environmental stewardship is a martial art. At which by majority we have been failing as a group. The human arts of these natural systems are qualities like: forgiveness, making important things important, humour, elevating vision, curiosity plus humility.

On a development journey Martial cleansing activity (yoga, tai chi, aikido) combines very well with the planetary arts of Mercurial vision or earth perception (topics covered in this series).

The art is of thinking ahead. Of engraving mental and emotional pathways in conjunction with life sequences of movements to process life in the moment. Thus maintaining focus on the journey without being sidelined by one’s own reaction or intrusion by bullying. These are forces that cannot grasp the need to hold the apparent contradiction of something in them and not pass judgement.

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Think about these three levels of engagement of your natural Martial art:

Low – not letting yourself get damaged but not being the author of your own story.

Medium – using what comes at you for you – think aikido.

High – using what comes at you to elevate your art of perception that powers your red art.

——

This is a mental model for understanding what you seek with your language and actions, intentions and vision.

AI Versus the Juggler

Juggle.

AI cannot juggle.

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The organization OpenAI has done really impressive work in the territory of robotic manual dexterity. But which robot has a reason to juggle? It has no reason to do so. On the other hand, we all juggle priorities like health, work, relationships and family, income and studying and maintenance of a home. AI is probably integrated into all of those aspects of

life but will never have an overarching need that goes into decisions that determine how the juggling of life is juggled.

So to keep control of our lives out if y the hands of robots we need lives that AI cannot touch. Yes robots and algorithms have their functions. Those functions are to get a result and use the result to get better at getting the next result. But there is no sense of elevating those functions to a transcendent goal.

So should we be scared about AI. You bet! A scan of the lifestyle of our global culture does not indicate that a higher purpose has been identified that influences education systems, youth and corporate, towards any sort of not for profit perception. Therefore we are in direct competition with robots for various functions.

Back to our juggler. She doesn’t look at each ball directly but looks forward to maintain all the balls in the air. Jugglers use a rhythm of letting go and grabbing so they can keep giving attention and direction to everything they have on the go. Whether that be 3 balls in the air or children, their own business, caring for aging parents, improving their education, finding a partner or possibly deepening their religious awareness.

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Developing this religious awareness, or soul life, can open other doors; individually to feel less threatened by a machine and, as a culture we can create an array of service industries based on the thriving soul lives within us that seek learning for self development as a human.

Your Tribe Man

I said yes right away.

My university roommate emailed me to see if I wanted a ticket to the Canada versus New Zealand rugby game in Toronto. We haven’t been in touch very much over the years but he knew I would be interested.

I was as much interested to see the Haka live as the game itself.

Watch this video:

The Haka is simple in message: unity in pursuit of peace. Since it is originally a Maori Dance of War, that pursuit included the possibility of death which tells me they are serious about their rugby.

The Haka is the full-on song and dance the national rugby team of New Zealand performs before every match. And is it effective in capturing their opponent’s attention? Well the All Blacks, as the team is called, from a 2 island nation of just 3 million people, dominate international rugby. I just checked the rankings and the Kiwis are #1 in the world as of September 30,2019. Awesome!

When another national rugby team plays against Australia or the Springboks of South Africa or Wales or France or Fiji – they are

playing against a national team. But when you play the All Blacks you are facing a tribe. A tribe, as the song illustrates, who seem to unblinkingly accept the battle that may result in death.

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Singing the song at midfield they are living their culture in a way that they feed it and it feeds them.

The Haka is an assertion of belief in their people, the validity of their past and its vitality in the now.

What’s your Haka?

What’s your song and dance to highlight your past and align your now? How do harmonize the support of your team towards a higher goal? Your team is your: body, blood and brains, mind and soul in conjunction with the intense emotion for satisfaction and purpose. This team in harmony with your DNA can provide a strong foundation for you to sing your song and dance your steps.

It is definitely a struggle to be at the vanguard of your own growth and development. That struggle can be rewarding or debilitating. It can be a confusion due to a lack of self love/understanding, disease, lack of guidance.

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So give your song and dance some direction in both your daily and soul lives. Start by naming your tribe of physical mechanisms and spiritual workings. Give it a name. Take the time to find one that reflects the amazing human faculties and your finesse with them. Know that you are the chief of that tribe. Your daily Haka is the song and dance of your refinement of today’s man. Your elevated Haka is the reassurance of being accompanied on the human journey.

Write it down. Move it around. Talk it out. Try it. Sing it. Share it.

The tribe of you through your unique song and dance.

GO YAW!

Go Yaw.

George Gurdjieff the mystic and spiritual teacher spoke about universal forces and principles. One very simple yet powerful concept is that of pitch and yaw.  Pitch is the thrusting outward force and yaw the receptive energy.  Here it is easy for an overlay to be seen with the yin yang understandings. I like to think the word Yoga had a little hint or message right there in the short 4 letters of the word. It is asking us, maybe telling us to – go ya. In other words right there in the name is the essence of the discipline: go yaw. We are being asked to do the work of the poses and stretches in order to set us up to receive.

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Photo by Katee Lue on Unsplash

 

So in class we do the movements and breathing to get to a point where you can receive, as in yaw, after the pitching nature of your movements.

As in any Martial Art the original purpose of yoga is to create oneself as a a node of connection between higher and foundational energies.  Practice over time produces self knowledge. This in turn results in personal growth so one can better manage daily life to be able to participate in elevating self knowledge.

Yoga is amazing. After a class I feel my body on a subtle hum and my mind at peace (read I carry less internal friction based in the whims of the day).

The breathing, the stretching, the speeds all combine under the guidance of a teacher who lands us in shavasana (lying down ‘corpse pose’ that can be followed by seated meditation). This puts me in a place of readiness to offer high quality stillness to connect with higher realms of perception.

                                                                          So go ya(w)!

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Photo by Daniel Mingook Kim on Unsplash