The Messiah has come – and she has left the building

Photo by Jim Sung on Unsplash

Naomi Osaka lost to the Canadian teenager Leylah Fernandez in the 3rd round of the US Open tennis tournament 2 days ago.

It’s New York. It’s the end of summer. It’s a major. They all combine to make for gripping atmosphere at an epic event. This year is providing some great tennis and exciting storylines. Teenagers are knocking out seeded players on a daily basis. For example Carlos Alacraz of Spain handed Stefanos Tsitsipas an early exit. With Federer, Nadal and Thiem not playing, #3 seedTsitsipas no doubt saw himself in the semi finals at the least. Not anymore.

Fernandez frustrated Osaka to the point of getting a warning for throwing her racket 3 times.

By nature Osaka prefers not to be the centre of attention but her outstanding play puts her in the limelight.

Actually she has an aversion to attention, social anxiety. It is proving to be more powerful than her ability to focus on successful professional tennis and everything that brings. Specifically the media spotlight. That spotlight , thanks to non stop social media, is as pervasive as it is superficial.

Is it because of the attention? Or the lack of privacy? Or not winning sometimes? Or parenting?

Does it matter?

Naomi Osaka has a life. We are not invited. She has a career like you and me. Her career requires post match interviews which in her case are stress inducing. She makes fabulous money. I’d love that money. But the impact of her professional life on her personal life appears to be too much. This spillover of the professional life onto the personal life happens to millions of people a year. So it is probably happening to someone, somewhere right now. And again now.

Naomi Osaka is not the answer to our dreams. We are the answer. Let her go.

I love seeing the thrilling underdogs, the awesome performances, the inspiring comebacks just like anyone else.

The more we live our dreams and goals the less we put our lack of self realization onto others. Be they our spouse, children, or some random athlete.

Put down the phone. Get out there. Reveal the new you. Make new friends. Breathe. Forgive. Focus.

The New You Series – Advice – Guidance and Wisdom

There is a well known adage that perhaps was coined by Confucoius or is alluded to in the Bible.  Either way it goes like this:

‘Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime.’

It would appear to hold true. This is very much the Rich Dad/Poor Dad juxtaposition.

Perhaps, in hindsight, there is a line missing:

Forget to demand respect for the planet from the man and he will destroy fish stocks and end up giving his children farmed fish full of chemicals. 

Let’s look at the adage through the lens of: Advice, Guidance and Wisdom.

At the level of advice is ‘give a man a fish’

At the level of guidance is ‘teach him to fish’

At the level of wisdom is ‘demand respect, from yourself and others, on behalf of the planet’  

Advice

Is for guys

Application is to work life, guy life, ego buoyancy, for not looking stupid, to the now

Forms of Advice – tips, sayings, phrases, guyisms, answers, encouragement

Advice provides timely ideas for someone to make decisions to get results.

Advice for any person, at any age in any stage in life.  It is useful to daily life and can stand the test of time. 

Provenance – brain

Relevance – bridging the moment with what you want

Photo by Anaya Katlego on Unsplash


Guidance 

Guidance is for men.

Application – Guidance is a resource for learning to deal with fear, for growing awareness, for understanding others, for facing the future.

Forms of Guidance – story, map, the legend on a map, questions, challenges

Guidance hints at the man you become if you listen to it and let it impact your life

Provenance – heart

Relevance – love, the need to love and be loved

Photo by JD Mason on Unsplash

Wisdom

Is for The New You,

Application is for participation in service to something bigger than you, curiosity and reflection

Forms of Wisdom – crystalized, dense yet light in its transmission, mysterious and confusing and settling

Wisdom is the language of the instinct talking about finding meaning and integrating it into life

Provenance – soul

Relevance – magnetizing to the truth and electrifying to action

Practice all 3 (Advice – Guidance – Wisdom): Know the difference so advice doesn’t get passed off as guidance; and wisdom doesn’t get reduced to guidance.

Demand advice from your peers, guidance from your parents and wisdom from your elders.

Tidy: Profile of The New You

Photo by Scott Blake on Unspla

“Hey”

Turning left out of the restaurant, MJ and I walk south along John Street.  I know I hear some running footsteps but, so what.  You never know who is asking for something so I put my arm around MJ’s shoulder and keep walking.

“Excuse me”

I look over my shoulder between me and  MJ and see this guy waving his hand and running towards us.  The guy was wearing black pants, a white shirt and a knee length white apron.  It’s our waiter from the restaurant.  Maximum 25 years old as he ran with ease towards us.

“Crazy” the waiter says, landing a few slow down steps as he reaches us.

“Look.”  He only takes two breaths to speak normally after a 2 block sprint.

“I think the bills stuck together.  I don’t think you meant to leave a $40 tip on a $29 tab.”  The waiter tentatively offers two twenty dollar bills.  The bills were probably just printed and put into circulation.  I had just got them out of the bank machine earlier in the day.

“I thought they felt funny.” I say putting my hand out tentatively as the waiter goes about half way.  

“Thank you very much.”  I extend my appreciation and my hand to receive my overpayment.  

“Right on.” Waiter says. There is a brief gap in the moment; and then he spins to jog back to the restaurant.  MJ  and I look at each other.

“Wow.  You don’t see that too often.  Someone running 2 blocks to give you money you didn’t know was yours.  Actually, in the moment I thought to give him 1 of the twenties.”

MJ says “I could tell you hesitated.  You could’ve.”      

Standing in the same place, slowly folding the 2 twenties, I look at MJ and declare “That’s honesty”.   Feeling proud to have been a part of that street vignette, I almost feel I deserve some of the credit.

MJ holds my gaze for a moment, then she says “That’s tidy.” 

TIDY

Tidy is living life with minimal loose ends.

Tidy is not military.  It is clarity of scope of any intention.

Scope refers to what you are going to do when and how.

How refers to the quality of your work and ‘the 2-stage hand off’.

The first stage of the ‘hand off’ is you receiving from the previous person what you said you needed in order to get started.    The second stage is you delivering what you said you would. That way the next person knows what to expect when you are finished with your part. Essentially ensuring the next stage 1 for the next person includes what said they needed to get started.

So if the person before or after you is not tidy, life now has drama that we aren’t paid for.

Being tidy is a reflection of self respect; It is an expression of understanding others and having the arts and skills to be understood.

Tidy is a great way to run your life.  

Like someone runs their business. 

You do what you say you are going to do.

You make commitments, make a plan and invest in the project.  Then people quit, get fired or screw up.  So being tidy can be a great hypothetical ideal but the daily reality can make your work anything but tidy.  Because someone on your team quit means now you can’t deliver your products on time. So you have to advise others that your delivery is going to change.  That’s business.  That’s life.

Sometimes there is a pandemic and materials or staff are scarce or expensive and your price changes and the customer isn’t happy or wants to cancel all together.  These are some of those changes that fit into the ‘you-can’t-make-this-stuff-up’ category. 

So many obstacles can get thrown your way making your work, and life, untidy.  You can’t control others.  You can manage yourself.  Your work is subject to outside influences.  When everything is going sideways, that is when you need to insist on being tidy in your mind.  Meaning understanding who is responsible, or to blame, but with an eye to moving forward.  

The New You Profile is: 

The man a young man strives to be;

The gentleman a man can feel he is becoming.

The scope of that gentleman’s life is:  deep, expansive, growing, challenging, intriguing.

Challenge of silence

check it out

The Journey

Challenge of Silence : In this week , I am taking challenge of not speaking any word whole week , if their any important communication and emergency then I’ll contact or communicate only using what’s app and email.

Benefits of Speaking Less

Wise men speak when they have something to say. Fools speak because they have to say something — Plato.

When we’re unconscious of what we’re saying , these repetitive and negative thoughts become the main ingredients that comprise our speech, what we have to say.

Because most of what we think isn’t worth thinking , let alone speaking.

We might depend on communication , but talking isn’t always communication.

“It’s better to remain silent and be thought a fool than a speak and remove all doubt” — Abraham Lincoln.

Intelligence

Speaking less doesn’t necessarily mean thinking less , but it can lead to better quality thoughts.

These are…

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The Temple Elephants

a real connection with nature …

Artistic & Wild

Cheruvadi is a sleepy town in Kozhikode, Kerala where nothing much happens. On a morning stroll, you’ll find gents socialising at the chayakkadas—tea shops, with women chatting on their front porches. The odd football game occurs in a field in the evening, the players caught in a silhouette at sunset.

In June 2021, I made a short trip to Cheruvadi, to visit my extended family. COVID-19 was ravaging the globe, rattling economies and breaking too many families to count. In all the heartache, I needed this weekend getaway.

One evening I decided to walk around the neighbourhood. Ascending a hillock, I watched the sunset over the rolling hills.

Then, a dark shape caught my eye. I turned, and a few meters in front of me was a full-grown elephant! I froze. Speechless, my adrenaline hit the roof.

The domesticated elephant Minni
Mini grazing behind the temple

Fortunately, she was a domesticated elephant, her…

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Raise Your Frequency

there is wisdom around us …

Frequency Facilitator

What does it mean to raise your frequency? It’s the same thing as raising your vibration. Still confused? In a nutshell when we keep our emotions in check, ensuring that we will do anything we can to experience the emotions of happiness, joy, and satisfaction right now– then we are being mindful about how we feel regardless of our situation. Therefore, we are being mindful of raising our frequency or vibration in a positive way.

Many spiritual teachers of our time are expressing the importance of being in observance of ourselves. This means to recognize when you’re feeling emotions (especially negative ones that don’t serve you), and to transmute them instantly, before you can attach a “story” to them.

Negative emotions tend to spiral out of control–that whole “hamster on a wheel” analogy. If we can learn to transmute our negative feelings to positive ones as soon as we start…

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TOWARDS THE SEASON OF HARVESTS: 2021 — contemplativeinquiry

In the northern hemisphere we will soon be entering a quarter of harvests and waning light, starting with Lughnasadh/Lammas. In the south there will be the energy of rising light and growth. In the manner of the yin/yang symbol. a taste of that energy is present here too. As I approach Lughnasadh/Lammas this year, I […]

TOWARDS THE SEASON OF HARVESTS: 2021 — contemplativeinquiry

The Silver Birch Book Of Questions & Answers {46} ~ Why Does Not The Spirit World Give Us Proof Of Reincarnation?

DiosRaw

“WHAT could be evidence of reincarnation, that you could not explain by spirit control? You will only accept it when your consciousness is ready, when it becomes clear to you that it is the law. That is why there are many in my world who say it does not happen. They say it does not happen because they have not yet reached the stage of consciousness when they know it does happen. Can a mystic explain his mysticism to a man of business? Can an artist explain to those not endowed with his sensitivities what his inspiration is? He cannot. They are on different mental planes.” ~ The Silver Birch Book Of Questions & Answers, P. 127

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Pioneer The New You

The following is an excerpt from my new book Satisfaction: How A Man Elevates His Skills And Qualities To Generate What He Wants. The book highlights men’s Emotional Agility. Emotional Agility here refers to a person’s capacity to synthesize daily and devotion emotion. This is the degree to which a person can cultivate their own sense of meaning while integrating the sense of peace this brings into their daily life. Emotional Agility is the way a person is able to rise up above the grind of daily life to recognize higher realms of awareness.

Pioneering implies going into the unknown. That is scary and can cause us to retreat into our habits when we actually can feel a need to grow. Pioneering the New You requires us to be brave and creative, perseverant and sensitive.

From page 108 … “The New You doesn’t exist without the old you. Yet the New You uses the past and resists being used by it. By standing firmly on your past with eyes into the future you invoke perception about what to do now. Each day, for each of us there is always a New You available. A version of you that comes with a higher level of intention.

Your New You grasps that a man changes as he is processed through the succession of Life Stages. He also realizes his spouse will experience a corresponding change thus the New You is nimble in the moment to update himself with the intricacies of her growth. the New you isn’t scared of the moment because he has no need to control it. the moment is free to flow into the future. So is the New You. Free to stop, smile and tell your wife she looks great.

The New You accesses his agility to get satisfaction. He is tune to his finesse to facilitate Fulfillment in others. He declares what he wants and has the humility to do the work to make it a reality.